Heavy Handed

Yes, here’s a post from a fat guy about how to lose weight. I know it seems silly, but 1) people that are fat know tons about how to lose weight because they’ve tried everything, and 2) I’ve lost almost 160 pounds and have kept it off for 5 years. I’d still like to lose another 20-30, but I’ll get into that in a bit.


           (Me in 2013/ Me in 2018)

I try to work out four days a week. Usually, I manage three. I do kind of an aerobics/kickboxing/weight training routine, and by the end I’m lying on the floor, sweat soaking into the carpet. It’s been pretty effective since I started doing it. I’ve only dropped a few pounds, but I’m down a belt notch and I’m closing in on that glorious fifth belt notch, the place I was at when I was working out at the gym. Still, I’m 240 pounds. Part of the problem is that since I started at close to 400 pounds, I’m carrying about 20-30 pounds of extra skin. A normal BMR for my height and weight is about 2550. My adjusted BMR (according to the weight loss doctor) is 2212. Those 338 calories a day make a big difference (2/3rds of a pound per week).

Anyway, Spring is finally here, and I like to walk in the park. The problem is that a walk, even a brisk walk, is not nearly enough exercise compared to my normal routine. So, I started Heavyhands, and sweet Jeebus on a pogo stick while eating Good N Plenty, that’s a hell of a workout (if you do it right).

The basics are that you walk around while carrying light dumbells. Most people use 2lbs, but I use 5 because I’m an endomorph and naturally strong. You’ve probably seen people at the park and on treadmills at the gym doing it. Most likely they are doing it wrong, swinging them with a normal stride or hardly moving them. I was one of them for two weeks until I found out that I was doing nothing.

I found out that the proper stride is to swing the dumbbell up so that it’s parallel with the ground on each stride. If you’re doing this for an hour, you’re basically doing 1800 alternating shoulder raises (I’m estimating one raise every 2 seconds, which is slow). I’m not at that level yet. When my shoulders would give out, I would do bicep curls or tricep extensions, then switch back when they didn’t feel like death. In addition, you should walk almost in a duck walk to get the legs and butt involved. You look like an idiot doing it, but it’s worth it.

By the end of the workout, I wasn’t as short of breath as I am after my aerobics, but I had no strength left in my shoulders or biceps. It’s a combination strength/endurance workout, like rowing. You won’t get as big as a bodybuilder or as thin as a jogger. You’ll get somewhere in between.

The only caution that I’ve read online is that you can get tendonitis from the repeated motion. I cooled down in a shower afterward and took some Advil to prevent inflammation. We’ll see if it works.

It’s nice to be outside again. I’m not going to do this every time, but it’s a good change of pace from my indoor workout.

This has been your daily “Fat Guy Talking About Weight Loss” post. We now return you to Doge memes.



doge in space card redux


Pokemon Go For Charity

As I’ve mentioned before, I’ve become mildly obsessed with Pokemon Go. It’s my new Geocaching. I’m walking for at least two hours every day now, and usually covering 5K. The thing is, I feel like it’s time that I can spend doing something more worthwhile to the community. I think that I’ve found it.

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