Category Archives: TV/Movies

Marvel vs Attack on Titan is Here!

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Marvel’s been using the term “titanic team up” for decades, but nothing like this.

News about a Marvel and Attack on Titan has been circling for a weeks, and now it’s HERE. Actually, it’s over here. Below is the first page, a little squeezed together to protect Marvel’s copyright.

Page 1

It’s shorter than I wanted it, but it’s pretty good. It’s got Spider-Man trying to psyche out Titans with trash talk (good luck with that), banter between Hawkeye and Black Widow, and Captain America being Captain America. There’s a pretty cool “ending,” but i’d hardly call it an ending. Really, it’s every superhero playing their bare bones character archetype instead of going into depth. I want more than just 8 pages, no, I DEMAND it.

If you’re going to do something so awesome, don’t skimp on the awesomeness. I’m hoping that this is just a tease. I won’t be satisfied until the last titan takes a shot to the back of the neck.

Meanwhile, a clever AoT fan took the Attack on Buffalo (with lots of snow) and recreated a classic scene from the series. You can check that out here.

Like my posts? Follow my website or “Like” my facebook fan page and/or follow me on Twitter. You can also purchase my debut novel, Song of Simon, at any online bookstore or a real one (they both exist). Song of Simon currently has a 4.8/5.0 rating on Amazon, so it’s pretty damn good. If you’re looking for something FREE, you can read my serial (soon to be an expanded series of novels) The Watchmage of Old New York. Though it ended in February, it remains one of the most popular serials on JukePop OF ALL TIME!

“Too Many Cooks” Just Ate My Soul

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I woke up this morning, and of course the first thing I did was check Facebook. Yes, I have a problem. This masterpiece from last night’s Adult Swim was all over my feed like a bored housewife on a romantic-comedy.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RzdRQCnDBlw

This is pure genius, a send up of every crappy tv show genre ever. It’s hilarious for about three minutes, and then it gets very weird and very dark, then it comes back to hilarious like a brilliant jazz solo. It’s a spiral of entropy into the cockles, subcockles, and colon of your soul. I can’t get that freakin’ theme song out of my head.

“It’s a lot to make a stewww…”

Make it stop. PLEASE make it stop.

Like my posts? Follow my website or “Like” my facebook fan page and/or follow me on Twitter. You can also purchase my debut novel, Song of Simon, at any online bookstore or a real one (they both exist). Song of Simon currently has a 4.8/5.0 rating on Amazon, so it’s pretty damn good. If you’re looking for something FREE, you can read my serial (soon to be an expanded series of novels) The Watchmage of Old New York. Though it ended in February, it remains one of the most popular serials on JukePop OF ALL TIME!

Shazam! Shazam! Shazam!…movie

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It’s been a long time coming, but they’re finally going through with the Captain Marvel…I mean…Shazam, movie. I don’t remember the last time I was so excited about a DC movie.

There’ve been rumors running around for a long time about a Captain Marvel (it’s hard for me to call him Shazam. It doesn’t feel right) movie. I’ve been let down before, but when Dwayne Johnson (The Rock), confirmed that he was going to play Black Adam, I knew that my prayers to the Geek Gods had been answered. Those virgin sacrifices upon an altar made of comic books and old issues of Dungeon Magazine worked.

I’m not going to talk about the history of Captain Marvel or anything like that (this link is a great start). I’m going to talk about why I love The Big Red Cheese.

An interesting redesign

Me and Captain Marvel (Not Shazam, godammit!)

One of my oldest memories is waking up early to watch the Shazam! tv show. I didn’t really understand it, but i remember having to watch it every week. I don’t think I was even three years old.

Growing up, my great-uncle Irving used to bring me comic books. Huge packages of random comic books. Mostly he’d bring me Marvel, but sometimes DC. This exposed me to a wide rang of heroes, but I never got one of that weird guy with the white cape and lightning bolt. I used to buy comics at the local Lamstons (a NYC chain similar to Woolworth’s) and they had a small variety of books. I mostly picked up Spidey and Captain America. It wasn’t until I discovered real comic books shops where I saw The Power of Shazam!

Captain Marvel and Superman

Captain Marvel stories are like Superman stories, but goofy and fun. They’re not afraid to be for kids. It’s pure childhood wish fulfillment: an orphan child that becomes a superhero through his own heroism, and then spreads his power to others. He builds a family that he never had. I didn’t realize it until I started writing this article, but I did the same thing with Song of Simon. In Watchmage, you could analyze Nathaniel as the wizard Shazam that gives power to others (Hendricks). It’s proof that the experiences of your past (even things you barely remember) color your writing.

My favorite Captain Marvel appearances come much later, as a member of the JSA and Marvel universe in general. He’s the moral compass that keeps other heroes from sinking too far. He believes in redemption and fair play. He’s as powerful as Superman. I think that he’s more powerful, with the combined might of several gods and the wisdom of Solomon, but they usually have the two fight to a draw (don’t even get me started on the DC Injustice bullshit). The JLA Unlimited episode “Clash” is a good example of the differences between the two (including Marvel wanting to stop fighting around all the bystanders, and Supes not caring.

I especially his interplay with some of the younger women in the JSA, like Stargirl. It shows his duality, a teenage boy in a grown man’s body. At one point the JSA had an intervention to ward off his interest in her. He chose to leave Stargirl and the JSA rather than reveal his secret, as the wisdom of Solomon advised against it. Sometimes wisdom hurts.

I haven’t read any of the new Captain Marvel, but from what I’ve heard, I don’t know if I like it. They made him less of the moral hero and a little bit shady. That takes away from what appeals to me about him. He stands out because he’s unadulterated goodness. He’s the hero that others should aspire to be like, even Superman.

You know why I like Captain Marvel? This:

We’re done here *drops mic*

Like my posts? Follow my website or “Like” my facebook fan page and/or follow me on Twitter. You can also purchase my debut novel, Song of Simon, at any online bookstore or a real one (they both exist). Song of Simon currently has a 4.8/5.0 rating on Amazon, so it’s pretty damn good. If you’re looking for something FREE, you can read my serial (soon to be an expanded series of novels) The Watchmage of Old New York. Though it ended in February, it remains one of the most popular serials on JukePop OF ALL TIME!

Joan Rivers Dies at 81

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I’m sad to say that Joan Rivers–one of the greatest comics of all time–has passed away in New York City, the place of her birth 81 years ago. Her daughter, Melissa, confirmed it. Here is a partial quote:

“It is with great sadness that I announce the death of my mother, Joan Rivers,” Rivers said in a statement. “She passed peacefully at 1:17pm surrounded by family and close friends. My son and I would like to thank the doctors, nurses, and staff of Mount Sinai Hospital for the amazing care they provided for my mother.”

A young Joan Rivers

Rivers has been on life support for the past six days. She stopped breathing during a surgical procedure on Aug 26th.

Joan Rivers was a pioneer not just as a women, but for all comedians. Her time on The Tonight Show was classic comedy (check it out on Youtube). She won an Emmy for her talk show, and a Grammy for best comedy album.

Of course, most of us know her from her work for the E Network, and that’s a shame. She was much more than that.

My brother, the comedian Scott Sanders, admires her work very much, and turned me on to her older stuff. Scott says “Her self-depreciating humor was very inspiring to me.” I agree.

What more can I say? Rest in Peace, Joan.

Doctor Who & True Blood : Late to the Game and Leaving It

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The big buzz in geekland this weekend was a new Doctor Who and the last True Blood. I have different experiences with both shows, and they prove how much I suck.

Yes, I suck. I freely admit it. I’m terrible with shows. I don’t binge watch, I don’t use DVR. I’m just bad at keeping up with shows.

Let’s start with Doctor Who: Late to the game

I’ve been meaning to get into Doctor Who for years. YEARS!!! Yet I never have until last week. I don’t get BBC America, so I never had access, and when I got Netflix…I don’t know, I just never got around to it. There’s so much great tv out there, and tackling such a long running show intimidated the balls off of me.

I don’t allow myself much tv during the day outside of info noise like ESPN or CNN. I write slowly, so it might take me 6-8 hours to just write 1000 words. I run errands, I go for walks or to the gym, etc. So again, devoting that much time to a tv show just didn’t seem like a good idea for me. Even though someone once told me that Watchmage had a Doctor Who feel, I still didn’t check it out.

But I finally started watching, and dammit, it’s a pretty good show. I started with the 9th Doctor, and I needed subtitles to understand him. Rose has big teeth and she’s mean to poor Mickie. But the show is light hearted, witty, and deep when it needs to be.

I just finished Season 1. I’m late to the game, but at least I’m playing.

But they were all bad

Leaving True Blood

I used to love True Blood. I watched it with religious fervor (often with a hand down my…never mind). The first three seasons were fantastic. It was fun, sexy, witty, unique. Plus Boobs, I mean BOOBS!! I feel like I can draw Anna Paquin’s boobs from memory now (yes, I paraphrased from State and Main) and that’s not a bad thing.

derp blerd

After the 3rd season, the show went downhill fast. They introduced the weird fairy stuff, werepanthers and witches. It got all over the place. They brought in a huge star in Christopher Meloni, and then…I won’t say what happened, but he’s not on the show anymore.

I started missing episodes, and then I just stopped altogether. It wasn’t worth the effort anymore.

You know a show’s bad when staring at a screen is too much effort.

Someday I might catch up, but I’d like to finish Doctor Who first. All 50 years.

Like my posts? Follow my website or “Like” my facebook fan page and/or follow me on Twitter. You can also purchase my debut novel, Song of Simon, at any online bookstore or a real one (they both exist). Song of Simon currently has a 4.8/5.0 rating on Amazon, so it’s pretty damn good. If you’re looking for something FREE, you can read my serial (soon to be an expanded series of novels) The Watchmage of Old New York. Though it ended in February, it remains one of the most popular serials on JukePop OF ALL TIME!

Philosophy Explained Through Art…and The Matrix

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I enjoy reading about philosophy. I think it’s a writerly thing, especially speculative fiction writers like me. After all, it’s our job to ask “what if?” “What if a great power is awoken, and the only way to stop it is by throwing his ring into a volcano?” “What if there’s a secret wizard society, and children go to a special school to study magic?” “What if there’s a world where the seasons can last for decades?” You get the idea.

I found this page very interesting. It’s almost a crib sheet to the major schools of thought, explained through art. Of course, you don’t have to follow one school exclusively. I find myself shifting from one to the other. Such is the nature of a thoughtful mind. Debating yourself is one of the best ways to learn.

I’ve been thinking about the “Brain in a Jar” theory lately. To summarize, we may be brains within a jar and our reality is nothing but an illusion (like The Matrix). Maybe we are avatars in some virtual reality game, or characters on a TV show? We have no way of proving or disproving this, since we are prisoners of what we can perceive, existing in our own private universes. If we can’t perceive something or perceive it’s effects, then we can’t prove or disprove its existence.

Dammit, I am!

Sometimes I wonder if this theory pertains to fiction. What if we aren’t the brain in the jar, but the ones who put the brain in the jar? When the aliens create The Matrix, are they creating a true reality for us to exist within?

The answer I keep coming to is that maybe it’s not real as we define reality, but it does exist. To exist, something must be perceived or it’s effects perceived. This chair exists in my reality because I see it. The wind exists because I feel it and see it blowing leaves around. That damn jackhammer outside exists because I hear it and see it shattering the sidewalk outside my goddamn apartment (sorry, just frustrated at the construction crew that’s been outside for over a month). Thoughts exist too because others can perceive or be affected by them.

Fictional characters may not be “real,” but they do exist. They affect our thoughts. They make us laugh and cry. They empower us or bring us despair.

We may be characters in someone else’s book or video game or whatever, but maybe not. Regardless, this reality is real because it’s real to me. I exist because I think. Would I exist if someone else thought of me? If a tree falls in the woods…

So if aliens have our bodies hooked up to weird tubes and created a virtual reality or not, I have to assume that it exists either way. We all do. Except for Keanu Reeves. He’s the One.

Like my posts? Follow my website or “Like” my facebook fan page. You can also purchase my debut novel, Song of Simon, at any online bookstore or a real one (they both exist).

Gal Gadot as Wonder Woman, and What DC Doesn’t Understand

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Comic-Con season is the geekiest time of the year. Every day there’s a new thing to go nuts over. This time it’s Wonder Woman’s costume in Batman v. Superman: Dawn of Justice (the worst name ever).

I like it, and Gal Gadot looks great in it (what doesn’t she look great in?). I picture Wonder Woman as more muscular, but it’s not my movie, I’m not the casting director. Gadot brings star power, if a lack of acting chops (the awful Fast and the Furious Series doesn’t count) and star power brings in the Muggles who wouldn’t normally see a comic book movie. Gal Gadot is a model, not an actress, and that concerns me with how they’re going to write and direct Wonder Woman.

Dark WW is dark

Dark WW is dark

Notice that her costume has muted colors, similar to Superman and Batman in the previous movies. Does this mean that Batman v. Superman is going to be as dark and morally ambiguous as its predecessors? Probably, and that’s the problem. It’s like Snyder played DC: Injustice and suddenly thinks he understands what’s going on.

DC keeps going for these dark movies, and that’s not true to the characters. Yes, it worked for Batman (to an extent), but that’s because Batman is meant to be dark. Most comic heroes aren’t. Superman is not dark. He’s the paragon of all that’s good in the world (next to Captain Marvel). On an aside, I always thought it poetic that an alien is the best example for humanity.

This is not 300, and this is not Watchmen. Snyder does not understand the characters that he is trying to portray.

The Trollvengers

I love Wonder Woman. Not in a pervy fanboy kind of way, but as a character. She is one of the most complex characters in fiction, a blend of divine warrior, compassionate human, uncomfortable diplomat, and lonely, stoic outsider. She is impossible to portray correctly as a supporting character in this movie. I doubt that anyone could even get her right in her own movie, which is a shame, because someone should try.

I suggest that Snyder look to the old Justice League cartoon from the early 2000s. They had a firm grasp on the characters, mostly because it was actual comic book writers doing it. Dark movies do not equate to good movies. You only have to look at what Marvel is doing right to see what DC is doing wrong.

Like my blog? Check out my debut novel Song of Simon, from Damnation Books, or check out my free, completed webserial, The Watchmage of Old New York. Or just come back here again. I’m pretty damn awesome.

New Thor, New Captain America, and a Sinister Six Movie: Marvel and “Worthiness”

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I’m a bit late to the party when it comes to the new Thor and Cap, but I have something to say about it. Both are about worthiness, and I think it’s something that needs to be explored. The Sinister Six movie, is about worthiness as well, but it a different manner. The idea of “worthiness” intrigues me, and it’s a theme I explore in Song of Simon, as well as other blog posts.

Thtop Being Thor About Thor

I’m sorry, I can’t stop using that Thor joke. It comes from a joke in Neil Gaiman’s Sandman, and I’m a big dumb animal that repeats everything he hears.

A lot of what I hear from the haters is that Thor can’t be a woman because he’s a man. The truth is that he’s not a man, he’s a god. Donald Blake (the traditional Thor) is merely a vessel that the god inhabits. When Blake touched Mjolnir, the hammer deemed him worthy and the essence of the god inhabited him. This is not to say that Blake is completely repressed, a la a D & D Magic Jar spell. Blake’s humanity tempers Thor’s arrogance and impulsiveness.

The Joker agrees.

It’s this counterweight that means that the vessel has to be worthy. It doesn’t have to be a man. It doesn’t have to be a human. It only has to be a moral mortal. There is no reason that a woman can’t be the vessel for Thor.

It makes me a little sad that people were more accepting of a frog Thor than a woman Thor. Verily.

The Falcon as the New Captain America

Right now, Steve Rogers (Cap) had the super serum sucked out of him. He aged 60 years in a few moments. Obviously, he’s not fit to fight in that manner, and someone else has to take up the shield.

I know a few people that might be worthy of it. Hawkeye comes to mind. He was trained by Rogers, and as an Avenger, understands the responsibility of the costume and shield. The cons are that he has his own series, and that he doesn’t have the moral stance to stand up to Iron Man’s and Thor’s crushing egos, not to mention an unhinged Hulk.

They could give it back to Bucky, but Bucky’s involved in some shady stuff right now.

They could give it to Spider-Man, but Spidey has a dozen of his own imprints.

When it comes down to it, there’s no better choice than Sam Wilson, The Falcon. Sam also trained under Rogers and is one of Rogers’ true confidantes and partners. He’s been Cap in the past for a short while. He has the moral background to be the counterpoint to Iron Man and Thor. He currently has no imprint, so he’s free from a writer’s standpoint.

Get ready for “Falcon Shield Punch” memes

Plus, how cool will a flying Captain America be?

It makes no difference that he’s black, enough that I almost forgot to put that in. He’s a symbol of the best America has to offer. That’s the only requirement to be Captain America.

Unfortunately, there’s a lot of racists (and sexists regarding Thor) that’ll flip out the way that they did when Peter Parker died and was replaced with Miles Morales. Their opinion doesn’t, and shouldn’t matter. Comics are about good and evil, and if you think that gender or race renders you ineligible, you don’t get comics or America.

The Sinister Six Movie: Redemption and Worthiness

Marvel just announced a Sinister Six movie. It’s due in November of 2016, and is supposed to be a redemption story of a sort. There’s no news beyond that, but I expect it to star guys like Doc Ock, Vulture, Rhino, and Mysterio. I’d rather not see Green Goblin in it, as there’s no redemption for him. Some other options are The Scorpion, Shocker, Kraven, and Sandman.

There are always villains that can be redeemed. Doc Ock has already been Spider-Man in the comics. Rhino is just a thug. Mysterio could easily turn his skills to do good. Vulture’s powers are kinda creepy, so I don’t know how they’d change him. Kraven lives for the hunt, which could make him a great hero.

Sinister, for now.

Spidey’s villains almost always have some sort of humanity within them. They aren’t a lost cause. I don’t mean that they’d be worthy of Mjolnir or Cap’s Shield, but not everyone can be a paladin.

I’m looking forward to these moves by Marvel. I think it’ll be an interesting few years ahead.

My New York Problem…

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Before I start, let me just say that the HIMYM finale last night broke my heart a hundred times.  They pushed more buttons than a 9 year old me in my apt building’s elevator.

Now then:
I was born in the Bronx, in a part of the Bronx called Co-op City.  I lived there until the 3rd Grade.  My New York experience was very different from other peoples’, and I feel weird about that.  I didn’t live in a row house and hang out on the stoop.  I lived in a massive 33 story apartment building with a courtyard of asphalt and a playground of sand and aging wood.  I didn’t have a bodega on the corner.  I had an island of shops floating in the middle of the street.

Co-op City is very isolated from the rest of the City.  There is no direct subway line (you have to take the bus to the Pelham stop and catch the 6 or just take the bus crosstown).  Because I moved out before I was old enough to travel alone, I never got to explore the city.  It’s not that big a deal, but it somehow makes me feel unauthentic.  It doesn’t help that I speak very slow, with a bit of a drawl.  I had severe speech problems as a kid and even today, I can be uncomfortable to listen to.

When I got older, I took regular trips into the city to drink and see shows, but I only went to certain areas.  If you asked me how to get somewhere in the West Village, I could probably lead you right there (although it’s been years since I was a regular).  Outside of that, I’m fuzzier.

Here’s the issue:  I love history, and I am very enamored with the history of New York.  I’ve never done the touristy New York things.  I’ve never gone to the Empire State Building.  I’ve never gone to the statue of liberty (nor would I, it’s a long, hot, trip to the top).  But I would like to see Castle Garden.  I would like to visit the Lightship Ambrose.  I’d like to do the lit walk in Central Park.  I want to go inside Trinity Church.  I want to experience the city like a tourist.

I don’t like tourists.

I don’t want to walk around with my nose in a tour book.  I don’t want to have to carry a map.  But the truth is: I am a tourist.  I may have once been a New Yorker, but now I’m not.  I’m somewhere in between.

I need to just suck it up and go full tourist.  There’s a lot of history I want to absorb.  I’ll try not to stand in the middle of the sidewalk and block shit up.

Here’s a question for you:  Are you more of a New Yorker if you are born there and move away after 10 years, or if you move there as an adult and live there 10 years?

Co-op City, Bronx, New York. I lived in Building 20 on Alcott Place

Black Friday?

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I don’t understand why they call it Black Friday. I mean, it’s a great song, but Steely Dan has written much better ones.

How about we call dec 19th “Hey Nineteen?”

If anything, we should call it Green Friday, since Shakespeare’s green-eyed monster takes so many people over.  I for one, don’t shop on Black Friday.  I hate shopping, I hate crowds, they give me panic attacks.  Going to the store during the worst shopping day of the year could possibly kill me.  I’d rather stay at home at kvetch about consumerism like the pretentious jackass I am.

Speaking of pretentious jackasses, I’m stunned that Family Guy killed off Brian.  He was my favorite character, my brother in douchebaggery. Dear Brian, in heaven, “Faster Than the Speed of Love” is a best seller. Here’s my favorite Brian moment.