This website has gone over 1000 views a month every month since last August, with two months over 2000 and one over 3000. Thank you all for the support. I promise to continue with the geeky goodness, silly memes, and occasional serious topics.

Oh, and more of this guy:

gif dog flapping

Fly, Flappy, fly!

BTW: The Watchmage of Old New York is 99 cents on Amazon until May 31st (2016). *hypnotizing voice* buyyyyyy myyyy boooookkkkk…buyyyyy myyyy booookkkk. Or not, it’s cool.


guinea pig card


New Year’s Revolutions

Well, it’s the first blog post of the new year. I better make it a good one. Let’s start with some kitten hijinx.

gif cat down stairs

I can never get enough of that.

First of all, I’d like to thank all of my followers, especially the new ones that joined in the past few months. Every time I get a email that says i have a new follower, my heart swells a little bit. Actually, it’s my head swelling, but I try to keep that in. I already have trouble finding hats.

whos awesome high five kitten

I hope that I continue to entertain you this year, either through my website, or through my stories. Normally I’d throw in a link to a novel or two, but I’m showing restraint. Look at me, restraining all over the fucking place.

*Pseudo-Philosophy moment* The years turn around, and hopefully we change with them. Evolution is important, but sometimes we need a push. They’re not Resolutions, they’re Revolutions.

So here are my revolutions regarding the site. But first, a poofy dog action hero.

gif dog running explosion

Still better than a Michael Bay movie.

  1. I will blog more often. Sometimes I go for too long without blogging. I don’t know why. I guess I get caught up in life and forget, or I focus too much on my books…still showing restraint here. I’m going to do more of everything. History stuff, Music stuff, Over-analysis of geeky things, weird memes and gifs. Just…more.
  2. I will spend more time reading other blogs. I like reading your blogs, but again, the world catches up to me. If you’re goodly enough to read my stuff, I should reciprocate. Let’s be a community of insecure people struggling to be heard…and post weird stuff.
  3. I will finish the Watchmage Wiki. I think that enough people have read The Watchmage of Old New York  that they might actually be interested in extra source material. I admit, a lot of it is done in a “game format,” as I someday want to create a board game or rpg based on Watchmage, but I think it’s still a good read.
  4. I will update my bio and evergreen material. I’m way behind in this. Some of my pages still have Watchmage listed as a serial on Jukepop. While you can still read it on Jukepop, the novel is very…very different, and much better. The next novel is even more so. Look, still no ads! I’m so restrained, like super duper restrained.
  5. I will limit posts about politics. It’s hard. I hate writing about politics, but the news always seems to suck me in. I get so mad sometimes that I can’t keep my mouth shut, but I’m going to try. If I do post about politics, it will be combined with some sort of geeky, literary, or historical analysis as opposed to straight up “fuck this” or “fuck that.” There are enough blogs out there that do that, and I don’t want to be one of them.

There are other things that I’d like to do, but I don’t know what they are yet. You’ll be the second to know.

Ok, I’m done restraining myself. I can’t take it anymore. Buy The Watchmage of Old New York! It’s like The Dresden Files meets Gangs of New York meets American Gods meets Who Framed Roger Rabbit? meets Starsky and Hutch meets Buffy the Vampire Slayer meets Doctor Strange meets…I dunno, but it’s damn good! You can buy it anywhere, but it’s easiest to post the Amazon link. Oh, and if you want to review it, I’ll give you a free copy. I can always use reviewers. Let me know, and we’ll talk.

Note that I didn’t plug Song of Simon. I figure that one shameless plug is enough…oh wait, how did that link get there?

I’ll end this with something funny to make up for the sales pitch.


Because I really don’t. Have a great day, and keep reading. I love you all, but not as much as the It’s Raining Tacos song. Sorry.

header for blog updated

Blog Reboot Part One

I just spent the day organizing my posts into categories. I also changed the color scheme, and posted a new writing lesson.

I would like to add an option for people to contact me, but I’m not exactly sure how. Will this do it?

If it works, I can put that on my home page too. Now I’m gonna try to add a poll.

What do you think of the new layout?

What else do you think I need? Within reason. I’m not adding a dinosaur riding the batmobile. That would just be impractical.

Guest Blog: Author Ross S. Simon

What a treat! Today we have a guest blog from a fantastic author, Ross S. Simon. Simon is the author of The Snow, from Eternal Press, and Red Dhalia, from Damnation Books. He’s a helluva talent. Check out this essay on how his influences helped to hone his craft. All of his pertinent links are at the end of the essay.

Ross S. Simon

Grappling with the culture of horror is about as much a part of my life and career as is absorbing it. There are elements I agree and disagree with; oftentimes a horror author, or “fright-write,” has to put the aspects out of mind that they really hate, or else, at least, mentally transmute these aspects into effective ventilations of their own angst and anxiety—often at real-life negativity—in the form of the writers’ very own expressions of horror in literature.

One of my favorite TV shows to watch in reruns, years ago, was HBO’s “Tales From The Crypt.” Okay, it was the heavily chopped-up-for-basic-cable version, but even so, it still entertained mightily. I saw, in this adapted form, the stories and their surprise resolutions of the slick and powerful caliber that kids in the early 1950s undoubtedly experienced when they were first run in the EC comic books. In “Crypt,” on television, I saw the basic paradigm for the great American short horror story.

The maniacally cackling Crypt-Keeper, with his literally grave-level puns, was also a hoot. And yet, here I look deep enough to see the bad side of horror, somehow: the Keeper puppet was created by Kevin Yeagher, the creature-effects designer who was also behind doll-of-doom Chucky, who happened to be an unbearable icon of dire terror to me while growing up. Chucky seemed to press the exact wrong button of horror in me all these years; this was one horror icon whose invocation in culture always left me not only scared but sad at the same time.

The Crypt Keeper

Here we have exposed the horror aficionado’s weak spot. Being scared stops feeling good; the line is crossed between, if you will, “scary (fun) place to go” and “safe (restful-from-motion) place to go.” When this happens, for just an instant it’s two of the “scary (fun) places to go,” at the same time, and then, forever, it’s one, big, “sad (not-fun-at-all) place to be.” This may sound a bit remedial, but one has to factor in the risk of horror violating the mentality of childhood, in particular during adolescence, which can potentially taint adulthood. With the possible exception of tainted adulthood, this is what happened to me with Chucky: his movies were popular during my adolescence. The timing could not have been worse. The suffering was excruciating.

Still, I’ve parlayed whatever traumas I’ve been handed by horror culture into my own horror work, thus not suffering a total defeat, as I can take expressive chance on displaying to all, in my written endeavors of fright, the worst fear I’ve held in very many years, that I’ve held it for very many years, and which is very real: people.

I’ve believed for the longest time that people are foul, dishonest, lying creatures, never making it clear what they want or what their problem is. Worse yet, everything there is—good, bad, having to do with me, or having to do with them—they blame me for, and only me. I can at least use horrific gods, entities, monsters and supernatural forces as an allegory for the basic essence of people as we know them, if I can’t socialize, and if I’m not allowed by people to express my point of view on certain things. Atrociously enough, despite what our Constitution says, they bar me even from that.

I know that to have the horror culture we do—which is there to entertain in such a way that the horror of real life, in most forms, is more readily approachable—is a blessing to horror authors like me. We all give a lot of original ideas a lot of the time, yet that’s as a result of having horror on the wing. In the culture of fright, there are about equal parts good and bad. In the lives of those like me, there’s a major subject—but only one—of negativity. And then, once one gets around all the horror, there’s only the good stuff. When you get back to being scared for kicks, there’s also a good time.


JukePop Gets a Donation Option

Hey, this is an article I wrote for The Online Novel, a great resource if you are into web fiction, especially serials. This article is about JukePop Serials (which of course, hosts The Watchmage of Old New York) and there continued commitment to making sure that writers are compensated for their work. You can find the article here

Below is an excerpt:

On October 15th, JukePop Serials issued a press release announcing the addition of a donation option for their hosted serials. This means that now authors can solicit donations from their readers. Each serial will have a donation button, along with a personalized message from the author. The minimum donation in one dollar, and goes into an Amazon account for the author, minus a small hosting fee for JukePop.

JukePop Serials, which recently celebrated its one year anniversary, has taken a progressive stance regarding author compensation from the beginning. Unlike many sites, Jukepop pays its writers upon story acceptance, and offers additional monetary incentives for story popularity.